bongo bong

no one understands how important microsoft excel is where i work. personally, i fucking love microsoft excel. it is easy to use, it is utterly the most useful thing ever. when i worked for real companies, i used it all the time. when i was self-employed as osca tank workchart coordinator, i used it all the time. i would have been lost without it. but now, as a temp, i am disappointed by how i should be using it more, but am not allowed to take initiative to use it. what are these, the dark ages?



no, this is the information age. not the roman times or the dark ages. update: who does this remind you of (on the left). that's right, [sorry about google privacy issues] watching rome had always been a strange experience for me at home in chevy chase because my parents hadn't understood how silly it was that brutus was portrayed by this britishy-jewishy ie [privacy issues for everyone involved] look alike. they hadn't understood why i had been standing, snickering and snorting derisively with laughter at brutus, because they didn't have very refined senses of humour. really, the people in union square the subway station ALSO didn't understand why i was snickering loudly at the poster of brutus. on a related note, there is an [sorry] girl who works at a used boutique clothing store. she is like so high all the time. she is exactly like a crazy, high version of [sorry!]. on a related note, her awesome store is also called "the pirate store". it is on graham and like, ainslie or something. on a related note, the owner of gimme coffee looks exactly like steven, although he claimed to have NO idea what i was talking about. i have NO idea what YOU'RE talking about. what do you look like in your head i wonder?



fuck writing short stories. totally fuck it. this is my short story
"i looked at the trashcan. it was full of like, witch hazel cotton pads, cotton pads i had put witch hazel on to use as astringent. i was so thrifty. i was wearing jeans i had altered myself using the [redacted] method. i hated [redacted]."

thats a good idea, writing about hating people and then changing their names. it's not anyone who reads this blog, don't worry.